Recently I was involved in an argument with a friend of mine. And while we were arguing, I realised we spent a lot of energy bickering, energy that could have been used to do constructive things in our lives.
And that’s what anger does. It drains you of your energy and it also consumes time. Two things when mishandled cause knots in someone’s life.
But also get me correct. I’m not dismissing anger. All I’m saying is that there is a positive way of releasing the brise. Don’t spend all your energy trying to put out a large fire using a bucket. Get the hosepipe and put it out. Most of us usually use the bucket hoping the fire won’t spread while the fire itself is laughing at our efforts. “I wish he/she knew they can’t put me out”.
Anger is part of the humanistic nature just as happiness is. The only difference is how we express it. Most of us (me included) when we get angry the first thing we do is to throw tantrums and yell at the other person. We think he/she is the cause of our anger. Yes they might be but we need to sit back and analyze. “Will it solve anything by throwing tantrums ? Will it solve anything by shouting at the other person ?” at most no. Then we should find another way to express our anger.
I was once watching keeping up with the Kardashians and I saw kourtney was told by a therapist whenever she is angry at someone, she should pick up her phone write what she wanted to tell the other person and after ten minutes if she still wants to tell the person that then she should go ahead. From that episode that philosophy stuck with me. I also was listening to TD. Jake’s sermon last year when he was talking about anger and life. He said anger is not a bad emotion just that we don’t know how to control and express it.
He suggested showing someone you are angry for it will provide boundary setting as they will now know what upsets you. He also said before you attack someone, ask yourself how you would feel if it was the opposite happening to you. Something I suggests we all try. As from my above article, I have tried to address anger and also give out pointers to help you my dear reader. Next time when angry, try using the kourtney philosophy.