Is it ? Should I ? Will I be judged for speaking up ? A question difficult to answer. Most of us (Me included) grew up with the notion that you shouldn’t break down or even share with others. Whenever you felt down, grown-ups told us stress is theirs. “School can’t stress you” “hujaonja maisha bado” I kept wondering to my self, really ? I remember when my mum passed away, most men told me I should man up and not cry. I soaked my emotions inside and the pain kept eating me up year’s later. Something I know most of those who have lost a loved one go through. To make matters worse, being an African has it’s own expectations on both boys and men. You are supposed to be as strong as a lion, nothing should tear you down while on the other hand, women are seen as the one’s to be submissive and carry the emotional baggage. Why so ? Do men lack heart’s ? I guess that’s why off late in Africa there has been a wave of men butchering their families and committing suicide. Leave alone Africa, its a worldly thing. When was the last time you saw a man cry on TV ? Or even a movie ? Look at Game of thrones, look at power, men are the ones who are soaking their emotions inside. Remember what happened to Ghost after Reena passed ? Well the notion of men soaking their emotions should change. Also for women too. They are not just the sentimental one’s. Because if you are sentimental for too long and don’t heal from the situation, it keeps haunting you. It’s like trying to punch a wall. No matter how strong you are, you cant bring it down. The best way to end this problem on my thinking is to allow people to let out. Both men and women. Let’s have support systems (those real friends, those wellness groups) those places where we can vent ourselves out. Companies should start checking on their employees, parents should start talking to their children, churches should stop condemning and start being part of people’s lives. Ask them how their week was, what are they going through, are they okay ? And with that, the world will be a better place .